The nursing team at Les Bourgs Hospice are still here to support you after your loved one has died.
Adjusting to your life now without the person who has died is known as grieving, and is our natural response to loss. Nothing can really prepare you for the death of someone close, even if you have expected it is going to happen for some time.
Everybody’s loss is personal and individual to them and the way we all grieve is different. Everyone grieves at different times and this can be challenging within a family, all going through different emotions at different times.
Different emotions you may feel may include; sadness, disbelief, shock, confusion and loneliness. You may feel anger, guilt and regret, but also maybe a sense of relief that the person is at peace now and the challenging demands of caring all over. It is ok and normal to feel like this.
Grief can affect you physically as well. You may not be able to focus or concentrate and be forgetful at times. Your sleep pattern may be affected and your appetite may have changed. Again it is normal to feel like this.
Sometimes the grief you feel can be overwhelming. Some people cannot stop thinking about what happened and some individuals spend all day and night crying. Some people feel they cannot speak about their loved one; however some may feel they need to speak about them all the time.
We are all different and these examples are all normal responses to loss and can vary day to day. There may be times you feel your day is kept busy and you feel you are able to try and move on with your life. Sometimes people describe their journey as an emotional rollercoaster due to this mixture of emotions and feelings.
You need to give yourself time to grieve and remind yourself not to compare your grief to others. It is a personal journey and you are adjusting to your world without the person you love. This doesn’t mean you need to move on and forget the past. Grieving is about remembering your loved one, not forgetting them. You can still move on and grieve their loss, with change and growth in your life. You can have a future.
When your loved one has died they are still important in your life, and finding a way to keep a connection to them even though they are not physically here can be helpful. For example; talking about them, lighting a candle, looking at photos, or taking part in something they enjoyed may be comforting.
Life will be changed forever but you may find an inner strength you never realised you had.
Many people find their own way through grief and with support from family and friends. However, you may feel it would help you to meet other people who have been bereaved, and have some guidance and support from our nursing team at the hospice. This may be days, weeks or months after your loss.
We provide bereavement support in the format of one to one sessions or group sessions occasionally that you can attend if you wish to. The sessions are run by nurses in our team who are trained in bereavement support work and are free of charge. The sessions last for one hour and you would attend four sessions over consecutive weeks.
If you would like to access this service please email the team at firstname.lastname@example.org
We are here to support you.
The Les Bourgs Hospice Nursing Team
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